This has all been planned, of course. It is actually part of the program of yon book, so that you, dear reader, while effortlessly absorbing secrets which have been lost for centuries, will immediately become adept in all manner of cooking as if by magic.
Well, maybe not exactly magic.
How about this: The more you read, the better you will get! OK?
Good.
The authors good-natured commentary is interlaced with real restaurant recipes, as well as some basic techniques and postulations which all cooks should know. Kitchen Rituals and Culinary Chemistry, by Bill Gallagher -- (Memoirs and True Confessions of a Commercial Grill Cook) -- will entertain and instruct you well. What more could you ask for?
What??
I can't believe you'd ask for that. Go to your ROOM! I'll be there in a minute...
Available in Printed Copy Only, all Editions of this book are signed by the author, and are guaranteed to arrive in collectible condition! Brought to you by www.autodidactics.com. Sales final on all info product, and thanks very much for checking this out.
Kitchen Rituals and Culinary Chemistry, by Bill Gallagher -- MemWAHS and True Confessions of a Commercial Grill Cook -- can be had by sending 19.95 (Includes Postage in USA)(Outside USA add $3.00) to: BILL GALLAGHER, POST OFFICE BOX 125, HACHITA, NM 88040. Paypal bgstuff @ earthlink dot net. Add $1.00 if using paypal. Put the name of the book in there somewhere, too, if you please.
HERE IS THE TABLE OF CONTENTS FOR YOUR PERUSAL:
Introduction
Chapter 1
How it all Began and the Making of the Bread
Chapter 2
Early Days In Florida, Pigtail Soup, and Chicken Parmigiana
Chapter 3
Dennys, Phat Flat & Groovy Grills, And Super Stir Fry
Chapter 4
Courtship Rituals in the Commercial Kitchen and How to Blacken Fish
Chapter 5
Dreaded Sounds, The Weeds, and Cooking Steax Black & Blue
Chapter 6
Ned Kelly, More on Bimboes, and Australian Springs Chicken
Chapter 7
Cutting Salads, Cutting Up, and How to make Veggies so Good they are Illegal
Chapter 8
Breaking Up, Breaking Heads, And Making Lemon Butter Sauce That Won’t Break
Chapter 9
The Cleaning of the Exhaust Hood, Making Parmesan Cream Sauce And Perfect Grilled Shrimps
Chapter 10
Just Desserts Including The World Famous CB Cake
Order now! Do Not Delay!
Better cooking can be yours today!
And if not cooking, then believe you me
Better LOOKING, from the smiles, you see?!
Here is an Excerpt:
CHAPTER 9
Cleaning of the Exhaust Hood, Parmesan Cream Sauce, and Perfect Grilled Shrimps
The words “ITS HOOD NIGHT!”, yelled out loudly by one of the restaurant managers (As they wisely haul their hineys out the nearest door) are the most hated words heard by any cook, anywhere, at any time. Fryolator cleaning is quite nasty too, but nothing compares to the angst of having to deal with 10 or 20 really cruddy and burnt-black grease-screens at the very end of a shift.
Yes, the hood screens must be cleaned ever so often, usually twice a month, and to accomplish this oh-so onerous task means one must use a long handled rod made especially for the purpose, to maneuver the individual and HOT screens down their track, to the front of the exhaust hood, where there is a slotted place they can be removed by pulling.
Once all that is accomplished, a major feat in itself, then the grease screens can be sent to the dishwasher, or taken out back and hosed like crazy in the mop sink, with extra hot and pressurised soapy water.
If in fact the screens DO go to the dishwasher, then that work station is also made unhappy on a periodic basis, again, everytime one of the pencil necks yells “ITS HOOD NIGHT!”
Oh, the cursing and gnashing of teeth, the absolute and REAL wishing of harm, and even DEATH -- let us say, the actual MALICE -- glowered upon the bearer of such bad and tasteless news; why, its nearly unbearable, and this is the reason the perpetrator of this crass and caste-driven remark is usually moving in the opposite direction, and fast, as the nonsensia of their communique is squealed, shrieked or barked.
Yes, they are usually moving as fast as their legs will carry them, and even so, many have been hit with flying debris by cooks having a good night, or who were serendipitously situated to nail the twit, before it could scamper out the door.
If cooking is a grease cake, then cleaning the hoods is like chocolate grease frosting on the grease cake. Ugghhh.
Reminds me of Dale P, the steak cook at Outback in Largo, while I was there, and my partner in crime when I worked the grooved grill. One night he was acting all out-of-character, at shift start, talking to one of the juniors down the line, like he was feeling sorry for the junior, because the junior had a hangover.
“Yeah, yup, I know exactly what you mean and boy that sure does suck and I hope you feel better real soon...”
Everbody without a hangover was looking around thinking --WHAT IS THIS?
...And let me tell you, the one thing that always fixes me -- well, how about I fix you up something to eat, I’ll make you my special, works for me everytime, a nice GREASY PORK SANDWICH SERVED UP IN A DIRTY ASHTRAY!!!
Junior did not puke on the line thankfully, but he did leave very fast.
Another time Dale P. got into it with Raymond, who was a high strung type, and the same guy who walked-out over my paw remark.
Dale and Raymond were going at it, long distance, from opposite ends of the line, hollering about something ridiculous, fighting like brothers. All of us between these two just tried to do our work and watch for flying objects. It was over some stupid thing like a salad -- Raymond was in the weeds and he did not handle it well. He was just screaming his monkey head off. Dale yells:
“Hey Ray, just forget it, and by the way, tell your Mom I said hi!!!!”
Raymond wigs out, and screams “YOU LEAVE MOM OUT OF THIS...!”
Dale goes: “Well, I forgot, you might not recognize her now, BECAUSE I SHAVED HER BACK!!!”
Once again Raymonds fellow cooks restrained him, and thinking back on all this I wonder was Raymond ever committed, you know, like into an asylum. Dear Raymond, are you a real nut now ? Hopefully you left cooking before it did some real damage.
SHRIMPS ON THE BARBIE AND CRACKLY RED PEPPER PARMESAN CREAM SAUCE
This recipe (CRACKLY RED PEPPER PARMESAN CREAM SAUCE) made me think of shrimps on the barbie again, because one of the ways this pasta recipe is served at Outback is as a bed for 5 shrimps skewered and grilled.
I remember them well.
Those 5 skewered and peeled jumbo skrimps, dipped in butter and spiced rather heavily, were a joy to grill if you liked seafood and knew how to get the best taste out of it on a gas/lava-rock grill. A good grilled skrimp will actually crunch somewhat when bitten into, because the meat is firm and fresh, and when cooked exactly, over high heat until the outside skin begins to crust and brown, the tension induced by the heat of the grill, within the musculature of the skrimp, is such that a near perfect fluid retaining consistency can be achieved on a regular basis; no loss of fluids, the skrimp actually oozes a white gelatine in globules, and that is the key indicator that it is time to pull the skewer off the main heat and maybe let tighten up a little, or hold, on a lower heat, but not for long at all, get them out the door and part of someones digestion processes right away! Timing is critical.
Shrimps on the barbie do not hold well, but are a great gift of taste and enjoyment to afficianadoes, when cooked correctly and presented well. A main draw of oriental steakhouses, where the food is prepped right there in front of you, is that seafood is as fresh off the heat as you can get, and thats usually different, and always nice.
The spicing for these shrimp was something like so: 2 tablespoons garlic powder + 1 teaspoon cayenne pepper + 1/4 cup lawreys salt, and after mixed, mix in a good pinch of paprika.
After dipping or brushing the entire skewer with melted butter, cover the entire skewer both sides with a good coating of this red colored spice. Make sure you do not overdo the salt, is all. Use only the salt that is in the lawreys itself, do not add any salt.
Use old shaker-type spice jars for your custom spices. Label well.
CRACKLY RED PEPPER PARMESAN CREAM SAUCE
This is a very simple pasta dish and the portion is a large one. It could be used if this pasta were to be prepared as a side dish in a dinner for two.
There is a butter/cream/cheese and sugar reaction, a pseudo-carmelization effect in the correct preparation of this pasta, which, at outback, was either served as a pasta dish alone, or as a bed for 5 skewered shrimpsters on the barbie.
When this cream sauce is heated over a gas flame, it bubbles nicely, the shredded parmesan within the sauce melts as the cream heats up, thickening the sauce entire, and binding very nicely with the sugar-butter within the cream. Sometimes as the sauce reaches finality, the bubbles will grow in size and when the bubbles are pretty large you know you are on the border of being done. The precooked fettucine pasta gets dropped in then, mixed well and allowed to simmer for a few minutes. When done it sometimes crackles, sharp bubble popping sounds, which is a good sign, and why it is a called crackly parmesan sauce. Keep it moving. Line cooks use fry pans that allow the flipping of food constantly as a means to mixing, and it works well. .
1/2 teaspoon each Rosemary and Thyme, fresh if possible
1/2 teaspoon each, Red Chili Pepper Seeds, crushed and whole
Good Pinch of coarse Black Pepper
Good Pinch Salt
2 cups heavy cream
1/4 cup finely grated fresh parmesan cheese
1 ounce butter
8 - 12 ounces cooked fettucine pasta, precooked, room temperature
Put your heat on high, and combine all the ingredients excepting the pasta in a saute fry pan. Grind the parmesan cheese yourself if you can, and get actual julienned type grating to it, rather than the powdery types sold in grocery stores. You will be glad, and you can go slightly heavier on the parmesan in this recipe, just remember that once the cream gets hot enough to melt the cheese, (Without scorching the cream which is your real goal here) it will thicken quickly and start bubbling big for you.
Thats when you toss in the noodles, room temperature by now we hope, and flip around in the frypan until heated well. In this recipe the sauce can actually brown on the fettucine if you cook long enough (Crackles) but tis a fine line there between enough and too much so be careful; the key is to keep it moving as it cooks. When its all steaming and of a consistency you like, then you are done, SERVE it! Garnish lightly with a little more grated parmesan.